Monday, March 16, 2026

Dignity, Worth, and Fulfillment (or I Look Better on Paper Than in Person)

 

Fifty-two years ago this month, I received a letter in the mail from an organization that called itself Outstanding Teenagers of America, headquartered in Washington, DC. I suspect this organization was primarily in the business of selling books to the parents of high-achieving high school students, and the books were rather pricey. This organization would gather all these names from high schools across the country and list them in their book, which they then sold to the proud parents. But they also awarded a rather hefty trophy to one student in each state who was named the “Outstanding Teenager of (fill in the state).” The letter I received in March 1974 informed me that I had been selected as the Outstanding Teenager of Utah and that I would receive the award in person from “Governor Calvin L. Ramptom” (actually Rampton). The governor’s office would contact me to schedule a time.

On the appointed date, my parents and I trekked to the capitol building in Salt Lake City from our home in North Ogden and met with Governor Rampton. A local television station had even sent a reporter and a cameraman to film the event, so I ended up on the evening news. This was sort of the final straw in a long year of awards and honors. My friends were so sick of me winning everything under the sun that they mostly shunned me for the next little while. So, after winning this heavy trophy and meeting the governor, I hid the trophy away and tried to vanish from sight. And that trophy has been in a box on a high shelf in the basement until a couple of weeks ago, when I pulled it out and showed it to the grandkids, just to entertain them with a little ancient family history.

How this rather impressive high school career happened was all somewhat accidental. I didn’t go seeking all this attention. I was a painfully shy young man who was more interested in sports and girls (not necessarily in that order) than in being Utah’s Outstanding Teenager. There were a few problems with my reticence, though. First, I was a good student. I ended up being co-valedictorian at Weber High. Second, I was pretty good at basketball (and am still playing, if you can call it that) as I approach 70. Third, my high school counselor was really into promoting top students for regional, state, and national awards, and she was very good at it. Fourth, I also was senior class president, which happened sort of on a lark. My friend Bruce and I were starting guards on the high school basketball team, and one day we were talking and one of us (I don’t remember who) said, “Hey, we ought to run for senior class president and vice president.” We didn’t actually know what that would entail, but we decided to go for it. I would end up the valedictorian, but Bruce was the smart one. He talked me into running as president, which meant I had all the responsibility, and he was just along for the ride.

Anyway, all this meant that I looked darn good on paper. I had the grades. I was senior class president, starting point guard on a reasonably good basketball team, shortstop on the baseball team, the school’s Sterling Scholar in foreign language, a member of lots of school organizations, an Eagle Scout (thanks to Mom), an eventual National Merit Scholarship winner, and who knows what else. And my school counselor took one look at this list and decided to go into full marketing mode.

The Elks Club at that time sponsored a state and national youth leadership contest. The counselor and my mom helped me put together an impressive book of my accomplishments, which I happen to have sitting here next to me at the computer (I pulled that out of the closet today too). The counselor knew just which buttons to push, so my application won the local contest, placed first in the state (worth a $300 scholarship), and took third place in the nation (worth a $1,500 scholarship, and that was big money back then when my tuition at Utah State the next year was $117.50 per quarter).

By the end of my senior year, as I said, everyone was sick of me winning awards, including me. The awards assembly at the end of the school year was not good for a still shy kid who didn’t want to show up his friends. I was glad when high school was over and I could just forget about it all until fall, when I trundled off to Logan for college. That was another strange thing. I had two full-tuition scholarships to BYU (one from the university and the other a National Merit award), where my sister was attending, but I didn’t have any friends going to Provo, and I was pretty insecure. So, when USU offered me the same money as BYU, even though tuition in Logan was a notch lower than BYU’s, I jumped at it. I had three good friends (including my co-valedictorian) going to USU, so I joined them, and we had a fun year living together, except for the cold winter.

After our freshman year, we all went on missions. The other three returned to Utah State, but as I’ve recounted in an earlier post, one winter morning during the first year of my mission, we were tracting in a largely empty apartment building, and as I was walking between doors, a voice spoke to me, not audibly but in my mind, and it said these specific words, “Roger, you don’t want to go back to Utah State. Go to BYU.” I hadn’t even been thinking about college, but my reaction was, “You know, you’re right.” I had fallen in love with the Provo campus while in the LTM (Longest Two Months, I was told), so I had my mom transfer all my credits to BYU, and that was that. I ended up getting two degrees from BYU and working there three different times, for a total of about 31 years.

But what about the title to this post? Let me go back to my senior year in high school and revisit one of the most humiliating experiences I’ve ever had. Because I was senior class president, the school administration asked me to represent Weber High at a youth senate program at the state capitol building. I rummaged around in my old mementos today and, lo and behold, I found a booklet they gave us for this event. It is titled “The Human Quest: An Ideal to Be Achieved.” Beneath that, the cover states, “United States Senate Youth Program” and “State Capitol Building, October 25, 1973.” The program included a greeting by my future friend Calvin Rampton (a Democrat, by the way); messages by the president of the Utah State Senate, the chairman of the state board of education, and the superintendent of public instruction; a keynote address by Ted Wilson, future mayor of Salt Lake City and, at that time, assistant to Representative Wayne Owens (another Democrat from Utah); an orientation by the state school board specialist for social studies; discussion groups (they divided us up into smaller clusters); a luncheon; a second round of small group meetings; a film (Why Man Creates); the announcement of semifinalists; questions for the semifinalists; and the announcement of two winners and two alternates. I’m assuming the judges met during the film to decide on the winners and alternates.

I was not one of them. Not even close. Why? Because, as I said, I looked really good on paper, but not at all good in person. During the after-lunch small group meetings, we student delegates were assigned a topic, and they gave us about ten minutes to prepare “extemporaneous” talks. The topic was “Dignity, Worth, and Fulfillment.” I was extremely shy, and while I could hold my own in a student council meeting among friends and do great on homework assignments and ace tests and sparkle at times on the basketball court, I was not a public speaker or debater. I had never thought about concepts such as dignity, worth, or fulfillment. I started the ten minutes of prep time with an empty head and ended with the same empty head. When my turn rolled around to extemporaneously elaborate on these high-minded concepts, I extemporaneously confessed that I didn’t have anything to say. Of course, some of the more loquacious students from other high schools rambled on about these topics as if they had them for dessert every evening. This was utterly humiliating. But that’s who I was. Lucky, I suppose, that the good folks from Outstanding Teenagers of America and the Elks Club were not present.

Now, here’s an interesting coincidence that I just barely learned for the first time. On the next-to-last page of the little booklet they gave us for this student senate experience is a list of “Observer-Judges.” They were the ones judging our participation in the two breakout sessions where I said nary a word except to turn down the opportunity to speak. I was looking for a specific name on that list of observer-judges, and there it wassecond on the list: Dick Peterson, State School Board. You see, Dick Petersonten years, nine months, and one day after this wonderful little humiliating experiencewould become my father-in-law. I’ve known for at least 42 years that Dick was the science specialist on the state school board. But it never dawned on me until today that he just might have been present at that student senate fiasco. I suppose he never noticed me. I was very unnoticeable. And ten years passed before I met him officially at his home in Midvale. I’m sure he never made the connection. Thank goodness.

I look back at that experience, though, and the others I’ve recounted here, and marvel at how a young kid as clueless as I was could end up in a student senate program at the state capitol and then be named the outstanding teenager for the state of Utah. It’s pretty mind-boggling.

Of course, since that time, I’ve figured out (as no doubt you have too) that I actually have a lot to say about a lot of topics. I could probably carry on about dignity, worth, and fulfillment for quite a while. But that’s a topic for another day. Let me just in say in conclusion that every human being has a certain degree of dignity, although some of us have squandered it on the fleeting pleasures and distractions of mortality. As children of God, we all have infinite worth, even if we don’t live up to our heritage most of the time. And fulfillment, well, it’s something we all strive for every day, even if we don’t know where or how to find it. I have learned that I experience the greatest sense of fulfillment through family and friends and my meager efforts to make a difference for good in the world. Serving others, in whatever way, is the quickest path to fulfillment. I wish I could have said that in October of 1973, but it was far beyond my grasp at the time.

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